Circular Motion
by Audrey T
Summary: He's packing his things while I'm threatening to leave.
1. Chapter 1

_He's packing his things while I'm threatening to leave.  
><em>

Edward and I are on the outs again. It seems we're never in sync.

This time, it's about Jake...and ultimatums. And, as always, it's a little about Edward's stifling need for finality; for loose ends neatly tied, bowed, and double-knotted.

He's pulling clothes frantically out of drawers, eyebrows pinched, lips pulled into an angry line.

"You have to make a decision, Isabella." He says my name like it's profane, like he might as well be calling me _bitch_. He says it as he stuffs my favorite shirt into a bag, the one that hasn't fit since freshman year at Forks, before he beefed up and became athletic pro.

"I'm not doing this again," is what I say. What I mean is, _It's you. It's always been you._

He goes to the closet, bare feet padding across the floor, and pulls out shirt after shirt, pushing them all into his bag, hanger and all. _All mine_, I think. The white one with pale blue and pink strips. The one that reminds me of graph paper. The blue one with a black stain on the pocket. The yellow with the oddly short sleeves. All crisped collars and unbutton cuffs 'cause I know that's how he likes them. And I can admit, that's the way I like them on him too. _Doesn't he see how I take care of him?_

He stops, halfway between the bed and the closet door, a pair of brown leather shoes in his hands. He says, "You have to choose."

"I have!" I yell 'cause he should know this, and I'm scared, and I'm frustrated, and him leaving seems too real this time.

He looks to the small box sitting on the stand next to our bed. Eyes turn back to me, questioning and accusing.

"I have," I say more firmly, trying to make him understand that it doesn't need to be sealed with a ring and a wedding and a vow. To let him know I mean it without all those things. That my words and my love and my actions should be enough.

"Edward," soft 'cause I want him to listen and _hear_ me, not fight. "I love you. I'm here. I'm committed. I'm not going anywhere. But I'm just not ready."

I know he doesn't understand, and I know he tries, but he should try harder. Either that or trust me.

We have our whole lives. It doesn't need to be now. It can't be because he's jealous. A shackle on my finger won't change that. It won't change how he feels about Jacob. Won't change how I feel either.

"You can't keep pushing," I say. _It won't help, _I think. But what I mean is, _I'll leave if you do, _and it's ridiculous 'cause he's already going.

He's standing in front of me, strap on his shoulder, another duffelbag in his hand. _When did he get dressed?_

"Bella," he says. It means _Please _'cause he's asking for a reason to stay and permission to do so.

And I just say, "I'm sorry," 'cause I can't give him either.

When he leaves, the jewelry box is still on the nightstand, opened and gleaming.

It doesn't matter.

A little golden band can't fix what's broken here.

* * *

><p><em>So this is the start to a new Twilight fanfic – although neither <em>Rapid Fire_ nor _Thunderstruck_ are finished (I'm still working on them)._

_This'll be a Bella x Edward fic but since it flashed between the past and the present, it'll also be a little Bella x James and Bella x Jacob. All other pairings are canon._

_Hope you enjoy. Please let me know what you think. All crit welcome. I promise to be gracious. :)_


	2. Chapter 2

"You know what's the most fascinating thing about _The Lord of the Rings_?"

We're sitting in Mr. Statham's English Lit class, lights off, television aglow before us. Edward Cullen's asking the question to one of his friends. They're seated just behind Alice and I, just as she's planned.

Alice answers what was probably one of Edward's many rhetorical questions. "Hot Elves who can handle a sword?" I can hear the petulant laughter bubbling behind her words. It must be her life's mission to annoy her brother at every opportunity. That wouldn't be such a bad thing if he wasn't already a perpetual sourpuss.

"Shut up, Alice." Edward's whisper is harsh, caught somewhere between a hiss and a growl, all contempt aimed at the back of her head. I snort a little, trying to hold back a laugh of my own. Out the corner of my eye, I can see him shooting me an irritated glare.

"Just saying," Alice shrugs, "He's pretty hot with those pointy ears and blond hair...and the way he rides that horse, like some kind of Elvin cowboy."

I snort again, and Edward kicks my chair...hard. That only makes me want to laugh more.

I turn to tell him _stop _but when I see he's really in a mood, I don't. Instead, I look over at his best friend, real-life cowboy Jasper Hale, who's chuckling and hiding a smile behind his hand. His laugh is this low, raspy sound that's maybe too deep for a freshman. It's a sound Alice has already told me she loves. In fact, she's made it her life's mission to make that golden haired angel laugh every chance she gets. She usually succeeds. His humor's much better than Edward's.

He never gets to finish his thought -Edward- 'cause soon Mr. Statham's standing in the aisle next to us, giving us a dirty look. Clearly, he's saying, _Shut up. Not just Alice. All of you._

Later, Alice and I are late to lunch, so when we get to our table, Jasper and Edward are already sitting. I take the seat across from them, the end of the bench, my feet moving awkwardly around Jasper's, which just seems to be everywhere under the table. Alice squeezes between Edward and Jasper, elbow catching the side of Edward's face and making him scowl. She's sending a message, broadcasting to all the girls within a five table radius. She's saying, _Dibs_ and _I saw him first _and maybe even _Jasper's mine, _even if that's a little premature. And he doesn't seem to mind. He just looks up at me and winks, one crystal blue eye disappearing for hardly a moment.

I don't know why but my cheeks burn.

Edward doesn't stay seated for long. He's looking at me again, all pinched eyebrows and deep scowls. He's saying, _What's Alice doing? _and _You're responsible. Control her._ I almost laugh. He might as well be asking me to control how the sun shines. Alice has made it her life's mission to get that boy.

Alice has made life missions her life's mission.

I tilt my head to the side. _She's __**your**__ sister_, I say. _S'not a big deal anyway._

Then he's standing up and moving around the table to sit at my side. _This is stupid_, he's saying, _Things should be even, equal. _He means, _Why's Alice fucking shit up?_

I just shrug and pluck a fry from his tray. What I'm saying is, _It's just lunch. Who cares?_

By the look he gives me, he cares.

* * *

><p><strong><em>Definitely surprised by (and very thankful for) all the subscribers. Thanks for reading.<em>**

**_The story will spend some time going back and forth between the present and the past, so it'll be a bit of a journey._**

**_Please let me know what you think. All crit will be appreciated. Seriously, I'll be very gracious._ **


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